Meet the teacher went great. I know My daughter is going to have a wonderful year. How do I know? Because she was so excited about a friend. For weeks leading up to school she was nervous because this year we decided to hold her back, so she wouldn't be following her class of kids that she grew to love last year. We decided to do this because my daughter has a summer birthday, and we wanted to give her more opportunities to bloom by being the oldest in her class.
On the way to Meet the Teacher. I told her that I was sure she would find a friend. I knew God would have the perfect little friend for her there. My daughter was very hesitant. But she walked in, met her teachers, and started looking around.
The next thing I knew, a little girl ran up to her. She said, "Hi! My name is Penny. That is P-E-N-N-Y. " My daughter just looked at her. The little girl went on, "I like bunnies. Can I play with you?" My daughter still stared. The little girl went on, "I want my bunny to go in the cage. Look he fits."
Then the greatest thing happened. My daughter said," My puppy fits too." And my shy little one Who is hesitant to engage with others started playing. I wanted to cry and shout for joy all at the same time.
Coming home all my daughter talked about her new friend Penny. I was so worried about this year, but I fear no more. She found a friend. Thanks Penny!
Wednesday, September 14, 2016
Saturday, September 3, 2016
Left
It has been two weeks into school ( 10 days), and I honestly am dreading this year. The year started out awesome. For the first time ever, my son walked through the doors like a boss. No meltdown! pure confidence. He looked back and blew me a kiss to tell me , "I got this, mom."
Then 5 days into school (two Fridays ago) something changed when he came home. He was upset and scared. I asked him about his day. He told me that he had to go #2 today. It took him extra long in the bathroom because the toilet paper is so thin. Then, he had to figure out the button and zipper on his pants, and wash his hands. He said when he was done, his class was gone. He went back to the classroom. No one was there. He started walking the halls looking for everyone when a hall monitor found him and took him to the office. His teacher was paged and she came to take him to his class which was in PE. By the time he got there, his class was finishing the mile and the coach told him to just run one lap. He was sad that his class left him, sad that he got in trouble for taking too long, and sad that he missed his favorite class PE.
I told him that I was so proud of him for wiping all by himself. He hates to wipe. He has a huge problem with textures of toilet paper and I am sure the school's thin paper drove him crazy. I also told him that I would talk to his teacher about what happened so he wouldn't get left again.
Monday rolled around and I sent the teacher an email. It had a brief history of my child. I told her that due to his fine motor skills, he may take longer than other children in the bathroom and putting on clothing. I suggested that she let him go first so the class wouldn't wait on him.
She replied and called the whole situation misfortunate and said she would do her best to accommodate his needs.
That day my son came home from school upset again. He told me that he was once again left (however this time with two other students) when changing for PE. His teacher told him he was taking too long and needed to go faster, She couldn't let the whole class be late, so they left and told the other kids to catch up when they were done.
My son told me that he was trying his hardest to go super fast but he wasn't fast enough. He was upset that he was late for PE again. He said that this year is just super hard.
My heart broke. Last year we didn't have these problems. He had an aide in his class that helped him and another little boy. His IEP is up for review this month so I started making calls to the doctor and private therapy place to get my papers lined up to make his days this year better.
Then this last Friday, I get a phone call. The nurse told me that my son walked into the door pole (the one that is in-between the two opening doors) when in line with his class coming in from recess. She was checking him for a concussion and he had a deep gash across his face (not requiring stitches).
I was extremely upset. I still am. I don't know what I am going to do to make this year easier on him. All I know is that I need to figure something out.
Then 5 days into school (two Fridays ago) something changed when he came home. He was upset and scared. I asked him about his day. He told me that he had to go #2 today. It took him extra long in the bathroom because the toilet paper is so thin. Then, he had to figure out the button and zipper on his pants, and wash his hands. He said when he was done, his class was gone. He went back to the classroom. No one was there. He started walking the halls looking for everyone when a hall monitor found him and took him to the office. His teacher was paged and she came to take him to his class which was in PE. By the time he got there, his class was finishing the mile and the coach told him to just run one lap. He was sad that his class left him, sad that he got in trouble for taking too long, and sad that he missed his favorite class PE.
I told him that I was so proud of him for wiping all by himself. He hates to wipe. He has a huge problem with textures of toilet paper and I am sure the school's thin paper drove him crazy. I also told him that I would talk to his teacher about what happened so he wouldn't get left again.
Monday rolled around and I sent the teacher an email. It had a brief history of my child. I told her that due to his fine motor skills, he may take longer than other children in the bathroom and putting on clothing. I suggested that she let him go first so the class wouldn't wait on him.
She replied and called the whole situation misfortunate and said she would do her best to accommodate his needs.
That day my son came home from school upset again. He told me that he was once again left (however this time with two other students) when changing for PE. His teacher told him he was taking too long and needed to go faster, She couldn't let the whole class be late, so they left and told the other kids to catch up when they were done.
My son told me that he was trying his hardest to go super fast but he wasn't fast enough. He was upset that he was late for PE again. He said that this year is just super hard.
My heart broke. Last year we didn't have these problems. He had an aide in his class that helped him and another little boy. His IEP is up for review this month so I started making calls to the doctor and private therapy place to get my papers lined up to make his days this year better.
Then this last Friday, I get a phone call. The nurse told me that my son walked into the door pole (the one that is in-between the two opening doors) when in line with his class coming in from recess. She was checking him for a concussion and he had a deep gash across his face (not requiring stitches).
I was extremely upset. I still am. I don't know what I am going to do to make this year easier on him. All I know is that I need to figure something out.
Sunday, April 24, 2016
Private therapy ( Medical Therapy) Vs. School Therapy
The other day I was asked a great question: "Why would someone do both private therapy and school therapy?"
School therapy and Private therapy meet different needs. A school will only provide therapy if it is academically necessary. Meaning that the school will only provide therapy if the child's disability affects their academics. For example, a child will not receive PT if they struggle with motor skills unless the motor skills keep them from learning. Take my child for example who struggles with core strength and balance. These two things would not count as a qualifier in schools.
School therapy and Private therapy meet different needs. A school will only provide therapy if it is academically necessary. Meaning that the school will only provide therapy if the child's disability affects their academics. For example, a child will not receive PT if they struggle with motor skills unless the motor skills keep them from learning. Take my child for example who struggles with core strength and balance. These two things would not count as a qualifier in schools.
Saturday, April 23, 2016
The Problem With Public School
Before I was a stay at home mom, I was a teacher. I was always surprised when a child would come into my class so far behind their peers. One year while teaching 5th grade, I had a student that was on a first grade reading level and struggled to write a paragraph. How could a child go through school six years and be this far behind? Recently, I learned the answer to that question.
This week, I wrote my child's teacher and therapist about my concerns. My child is really struggling with spelling. Since he doesn't say his words correctly, he can't sound them out to write them. For example, he wrote, " Ve pewn li to et fis" ( The penguin likes to eat fish). Even though he struggles with writing, he has no problem reading the sentence. I asked them for ideas on how I can help him at home. I asked how they were helping him at school. I also asked how we were going to continue helping his speech this summer.
Here are some highlights of different things I was told: spelling errors are common with children who have articulation difficulties; the best thing I can do is continue to expose my child to words through reading; his writing will get better with time the more he is exposed to words and the more his speech develops; he can not be tested for dyslexia for another three years; they will keep an eye on him; he will continue to work on his writing during centers; the older he gets, the more he will have technology to aid his writing; he doesn't qualify for any services this summer because he is too high functioning ( he must be at least two years behind to receive services).
It was after reading the responses that things clicked. I finally realized the problem with public school. I think that it is absolutely ridiculous for a child to have to fall two years behind before they can receive services. By then, how are they suppose to catch up? It just doesn't seem fair. It breaks my heart for all of these kids that fall between the cracks ( the kids that are functioning below their peers, but too high that they are monitoring for the two year gap). A parent can plead for help, but there is nothing the school will do. The only other answer is to find help for the child elsewhere which ends up costing a lot of money. Many families don't have that option. The most interesting thing about going elsewhere is that you will find out that a medical facility will script a child receiving services at school for more therapy than what the school is offering. My son is scripted four hours of individual therapy a week, but the school will only give him 30 minutes in a group setting.
It also fustrated me that my son's opportunities to better his writing will be done in centers. Centers are for independent activities. How can one develop a skill through a center? Centers are for practicing what you have already developed.
The system really needs to change so that it is helping all kids grow and be successful; so that, one day little Steven doesn't show up to fifth grade on a first grade reading level and struggling to write. I don't know if things will ever change, but I hope one day it will.
This week, I wrote my child's teacher and therapist about my concerns. My child is really struggling with spelling. Since he doesn't say his words correctly, he can't sound them out to write them. For example, he wrote, " Ve pewn li to et fis" ( The penguin likes to eat fish). Even though he struggles with writing, he has no problem reading the sentence. I asked them for ideas on how I can help him at home. I asked how they were helping him at school. I also asked how we were going to continue helping his speech this summer.
Here are some highlights of different things I was told: spelling errors are common with children who have articulation difficulties; the best thing I can do is continue to expose my child to words through reading; his writing will get better with time the more he is exposed to words and the more his speech develops; he can not be tested for dyslexia for another three years; they will keep an eye on him; he will continue to work on his writing during centers; the older he gets, the more he will have technology to aid his writing; he doesn't qualify for any services this summer because he is too high functioning ( he must be at least two years behind to receive services).
It was after reading the responses that things clicked. I finally realized the problem with public school. I think that it is absolutely ridiculous for a child to have to fall two years behind before they can receive services. By then, how are they suppose to catch up? It just doesn't seem fair. It breaks my heart for all of these kids that fall between the cracks ( the kids that are functioning below their peers, but too high that they are monitoring for the two year gap). A parent can plead for help, but there is nothing the school will do. The only other answer is to find help for the child elsewhere which ends up costing a lot of money. Many families don't have that option. The most interesting thing about going elsewhere is that you will find out that a medical facility will script a child receiving services at school for more therapy than what the school is offering. My son is scripted four hours of individual therapy a week, but the school will only give him 30 minutes in a group setting.
It also fustrated me that my son's opportunities to better his writing will be done in centers. Centers are for independent activities. How can one develop a skill through a center? Centers are for practicing what you have already developed.
The system really needs to change so that it is helping all kids grow and be successful; so that, one day little Steven doesn't show up to fifth grade on a first grade reading level and struggling to write. I don't know if things will ever change, but I hope one day it will.
Tuesday, April 19, 2016
The Day I Saw Fruit From Our Labor
This weekend our church held a Sunday School Program to showcase everything the children have learned throughout the year. Both of our kids had practice their roles many times at home and were so excited. They got dressed in their Sunday best and ran to the children's center that morning. I gave them a kiss and told them that they would do great. Then, I went to get a seat.
I was not prepared for what happened next.
My little girl's class was first. She stood up, smiled big, and with great confidence shouted her line. I was so proud. To see her stand up in front of a crowd next to other children and speak with emotion is huge! Two years ago she wouldn't tolerate even being around two other people and struggled with expression. It was a very exciting.
Then, my son's class lined up. I noticed all the other kids were looking at my son as he STARTED THE PRAYER. Tears rolled down my face as I saw him do this with great eye contact and expression. It was at this moment that I fully realized that God answered my prayer from five years ago.
I remember that night so vividly. Crying ugly tears and asking God to please restore my child's health and his voice. I remember how hard it was sitting through evaluations and listening to the results. I remember everyday of therapy then and now.
Sometimes you get so caught up in routines that you do not realize the amount of progress since "that day". This weekend was a great reminder to me of how far we have come on this journey. It blows my mind how God can take a little boy who lost his speech to five years later standing in front of his program leading the prayer and a little girl who struggled to connect to two years later standing with her class to do a program in front of a crowd. God is amazing!
I am so thankful. Thankful to God and all of those he has used to do wonderful works in my children. It is nice to see all the fruits from the labor.
I was not prepared for what happened next.
My little girl's class was first. She stood up, smiled big, and with great confidence shouted her line. I was so proud. To see her stand up in front of a crowd next to other children and speak with emotion is huge! Two years ago she wouldn't tolerate even being around two other people and struggled with expression. It was a very exciting.
Then, my son's class lined up. I noticed all the other kids were looking at my son as he STARTED THE PRAYER. Tears rolled down my face as I saw him do this with great eye contact and expression. It was at this moment that I fully realized that God answered my prayer from five years ago.
I remember that night so vividly. Crying ugly tears and asking God to please restore my child's health and his voice. I remember how hard it was sitting through evaluations and listening to the results. I remember everyday of therapy then and now.
Sometimes you get so caught up in routines that you do not realize the amount of progress since "that day". This weekend was a great reminder to me of how far we have come on this journey. It blows my mind how God can take a little boy who lost his speech to five years later standing in front of his program leading the prayer and a little girl who struggled to connect to two years later standing with her class to do a program in front of a crowd. God is amazing!
I am so thankful. Thankful to God and all of those he has used to do wonderful works in my children. It is nice to see all the fruits from the labor.
Saturday, February 6, 2016
What I Thought I Knew
Before my children, I was a teacher for eight years. I sat in IEP ( Individualized Education Plan) meetings discussing modifications and accommodations the child would have. I followed the plan to a "t". I looked at an IEP plan as helping "level" the field for kids with special needs. I documented and checked off all the things I was doing like extending time, giving fewer choices, reading tests, and moving their seat closer. I never really understood the impact and importance of an IEP for the student and the family until I sat on the other side of the table years later for my own children. I then felt the emotion and frustration a parent feels fighting for their child's needs to be met. I am thankful for the teachers and therapist that show empathy and really want to help. When I do go back to teaching, I will not be the same. I am thankful that my children have opened my eyes to the other side.
Saturday, January 16, 2016
You Are Welcome To Make Accommodations At Home
Before the New Year, the school held an IEP meeting for my son. All testing had been turned in from our private therapy facility and extra testing had been done through the schools. They started the meeting by telling me that even though he required four hours of public therapy, through the schools they would only provide what was academically necessary. So, instead of two hours of speech and two hours of occupational therapy, he would receive 45 minutes of speech a week. I was told it wasn't academically necessary for him to receive any OT. When I argued and said, "But, he can't button and zip his pants and has trouble dressing himself when he uses the restroom." They told me to make accommodations at home, so that, this wouldn't be a problem at school. The OT told me,"Send him to school in elastic pants, so it won't be a problem. Many students wear them."
So, my son started receiving speech services after the holiday, and I started making accommodations at home. Everyday I send him to school in clothes that will not cause a disruption, and he will he successful in until Wednesday. Wednesday temperatures were below zero. I had to send him to school in a snowsuit. Because he couldn't take it off quickly, he got a tardy. Then, he caused his class to be late at dismissal because the teacher had to put it back on him. When I went to pick him up, his teacher told me that if I send him to school in clothing that he can't manage, I need to come in to help him take it off and put it on because she has 24 students and can't help him.
I understand that teachers are busy. I do. I taught for eight years. This to me should be a red flag that yes it is academically necessary to give this kid occupational therapy. What if, I wasn't available to help my son? Would he not receive the help he needs? The system really frustrates me, but I know the system well. I know for any change to occur I must document everything. Still I am not sure if that will even be enough. It's hard when your kid is one of the ones that falls in the cracks ( not low enough to receive services but still needs help). I am just thankful that I am a mom that can accommadate and be there.
So, my son started receiving speech services after the holiday, and I started making accommodations at home. Everyday I send him to school in clothes that will not cause a disruption, and he will he successful in until Wednesday. Wednesday temperatures were below zero. I had to send him to school in a snowsuit. Because he couldn't take it off quickly, he got a tardy. Then, he caused his class to be late at dismissal because the teacher had to put it back on him. When I went to pick him up, his teacher told me that if I send him to school in clothing that he can't manage, I need to come in to help him take it off and put it on because she has 24 students and can't help him.
I understand that teachers are busy. I do. I taught for eight years. This to me should be a red flag that yes it is academically necessary to give this kid occupational therapy. What if, I wasn't available to help my son? Would he not receive the help he needs? The system really frustrates me, but I know the system well. I know for any change to occur I must document everything. Still I am not sure if that will even be enough. It's hard when your kid is one of the ones that falls in the cracks ( not low enough to receive services but still needs help). I am just thankful that I am a mom that can accommadate and be there.
Thursday, January 14, 2016
Starting Over In a New State
Recently, we moved to a different state and started the process to qualify for therapy again. One of the hardest things about moving is starting this process over. Each state has their own testing and requirements. The fastest way to do this is through private therapy. Once a new doctor has put in a script, you pay fees for new evaluations. This process can be costly. For example, it was $600 for each child to receive a ST, PT, and OT evaluation. Since we have not reached our deductable, this was an expense out of pocket. Once we found out that we did qualify, we also found out that insurance was not going to really help us (for the 7 hours of therapy at $200 an hour). We then turned to the schools to help our children with therapy. Testing through the schools took three months. They took the evaluations from private therapy, but added their own testing as well. Then, it was followed by the IEP process before we could start. We moved here mid-August and my kids are starting therapy in the new year. I am excited that it is finally happening, but exhausted by the whole process. The schools are also only giving my children speech. Where as, in private they qualified for speech and occupational therapy. Right now, we are going to take what we can get and call it a win.
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