Trick or Treating with Special Needs Children

Halloween can be a fun time, but it can also be hard on special needs children. Here are some tips to help them get through this holiday.

1.     Prepare- It is very important to prepare special needs children for big events. At our house, we prepare our children in many ways:

·        Create a countdown calendar

·        Make Halloween crafts

·        Read books about Halloween and trick-or-treating.”Berenstain Bears Trick or Treat”, “Spooky, Spooky, Spooky”, “Five Little Monkey’s Trick or Treat”, “Trick or Treat with Elmo”, and “Llama Llama Trick or Treat” are some of our favorite books.

·        Watch Halloween shows that include trick-or-treating. “It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown”, “Spooky Buddies”, “Clifford’s Halloween”, and “Curious George’s Boo Fest” are some of our favorite shows.

·        Form a trick or treating map. Visuals are a great tool for special needs children.

·        Read a social story about trick or treating:

Halloween is a fun holiday. Many kids trick or treat during this holiday. Before I trick or treat, I put on a costume. Then, I grab a bag. When I am ready, I walk with my parents to our neighbor’s houses. I ring the door bell. I say, “Trick or treat.” I hold open my bag. The neighbor puts different kinds of candy or a treat in my bag. I say, “Thank you.” Then, we walk to the next house. When my parents say it is time to walk home, I listen. I go home and look at all of my candy and treats.

 

 

2.     Find the right costume- The right costume can really make a big difference in how well the night goes. Make sure that the costume fits the child. My son prefers tight clothing where my daughter prefers loose. My son also prefers wearing a mask. It calms his anxiety. Have them pick out and try on their costumes to make sure it is comfortable. Don’t forget to think through all aspects of the costume before picking one.

 

3.     Practice- Practice makes a child feel comfortable and calms anxiety. We practice ringing the door bell of our own house and saying, “Trick or treat”. We also practice at small community events like our church “Trunk or Treat”.

 

4.     Routine- Try to fit trick or treating into your routine. This event should be planned around dinner and bed time routine.

 

5.     Notify Neighbors- If your child is on a special diet or is non-verbal, notify your neighbors of your child’s needs. You can even give your neighbor a special item to hand your child, so they can still participate in the fun.

 

6.     Monitor- Monitor your child, and see how they are handling Halloween. You might need to do fewer houses than expected or go earlier to avoid crowds. Make sure you are prepared to change your plans, and have therapy equipment available. For example, your child might need a calming device such as a chewy or noise reduction head phones. You know your child best. If you see your child is starting to have a hard time, try to help them work through it before a meltdown occurs.

 

Halloween is a fun time for all. I hope these tips will take the fright out of the night. Happy haunting, and Happy Halloween!

 

 

 

 

 

What to Ask Developmental Pediatrician

One of my sweet friends was approached by her child’s teacher about having her son tested for delays.  She was thrown so off guard and had no idea where to start or what to do. The first thing to do, is to arrange an appointment with a developmental pediatrician. The developmental pediatrician can tell you if you need a referral for an evaluation with a therapist (speech, occupational, or physical).

Upon making the appointment to see the pediatrician, make sure you form a list documenting your child’s milestones thus far. You know your child best, so this part should be easy. Things I documented:

·        I wrote down every word that came out of my child’s mouth for a week

·        I kept a food journal

·        I documented movement and concerns

·        I recorded my child’s responses to others and the environment (noise, light, textures)

Then, write down questions you have about your child’s development. I have included some of the questions I had in the past as examples:

·        Your child’s speech: When should my child being expressing themselves through movement such as pointing and waving? How many words should my child be saying at that age? How well should I understand my child? When should my child be able to eat certain foods? When should my child stop drooling? When should my child be able to chew?

·        Your child’s motor development: When should my child be able to roll over, stand, take a step, walk, run? When should my child stop toe walking? How far should my child be able to go without being held? When should my child be able to hold a writing device, or draw a line, circle, letters, and numbers? When should my child have better balance?

·        Your child’s social development: How should my child be interacting with others?

After you prepare yourself for the visit, you have to go through the hard part of waiting and the doctor’s response. The doctor may not have all the answers yet. You may need further testing. No matter what happens, know that you are not alone. There are many people out there that are going through this journey too and are willing to walk beside you. The journey isn’t easy, but there is support. Good luck!

Your Child’s Diagnosis is Not Your Fault

Last week, one of my friend’s sons got a new diagnosis. As she poured out her fears and their plan, she also talked about feeling guilty. I totally could relate, and I would bet that a lot of special needs parents go through this stage of feeling guilty. It is just part of the process of grief to acceptance.

When my son lost all language soon after his first birthday, I totally blamed myself for his delays. I blamed myself for his hard delivery. I blamed myself for his illnesses (because I should have protected him more from germs). I blamed myself in case it was hereditary. And then when my daughter became sensory defensive and couldn’t handle touch, I blamed myself for not giving her enough skin to skin (since I couldn’t breast feed her).

I would lie in bed crying and feeling horrible until I realized the truth. IT IS NOT MY FAULT. Sometimes life throws us some twists and turns that are unexpected and unexplainable. I realized that I could sit and wonder “Why me?”, “Why my children?”, or “How could I have prevented this?” But, that would mean I would be stuck in the past or in the present dwelling in sorrow. Instead, I choose to focus forward on the plan and live day to day working towards goals to help my children.

Everyone reacts differently to the news of a diagnosis. It can truly be a time of emotional turmoil. Just know that it is very unlikely that you did something to cause this even if it is hereditary. You cannot help your genes!  The emotions you are feeling are natural. You are not alone.

 

As I sat in the waiting room talking to this mom, I as well as another mom also shared our stories of guilt. I hope it made her feel better to know that she is not alone. I also really hope that she realized that it is not her fault.

 If you are having a hard time working through this, please find a support group, counselor, or a friend that you can talk to. Do not isolate yourself. Please take care of yourself, so you can be at your best for your child.

Finding the Right Therapist

When we first started going to therapy, my son had an incredible therapist. He bonded with her, and she helped guide me /prepare me for this journey. When we moved to another state, I was scared that we would never find someone as wonderful as our first therapist.

The first five months in our new state were difficult. We started with a therapist our doctor recommended. She was fresh out of college and really didn’t know what she was doing. She jumped all over the place as far as skills and was not good at communicating what I needed to do at home. The next therapist we tried was pregnant and just ready to have the baby. She didn’t work on my son’s goals and allowed him to not participate. Our third attempt was “the charm”. The therapist was warm and inviting. She took the time to talk with me and helped me problem solve ways to help my child. She cared about my child and created a plan to help him progress. She also followed up with me to let me know how he was doing each session and gave me things for us to work on at home. I felt so blessed to finally find the right fit.

This week I was asked, “What do you look for in a therapist?” The mom was new to the therapy world and was looking into therapy for her child. I told her this:

·        someone that is knowledgeable and a critical thinker

·        someone who listens and is empathetic

·        someone who has a plan (on your specific child) and gives you updates

·        someone who cares about your child and wants the best for them

·        someone who will challenge your child

·        someone who will communicate with you and work with you as a team

·        someone who connects with your child

Finding the perfect therapist makes a huge difference in your child’s progress. It might take a couple of clinics before you find the perfect fit. If you are not sure where to start, ask around and see who others recommend. Then, schedule a walk through and meeting with the therapist before you begin to get a “feel” of the environment. It is always okay to change clinics. It might be hard in the beginning, but finding the right fit will work out in the long run.

Extracurricular Activities and Special Needs

Extracurricular activities are really important for special needs children. It helps encourage socialization, creativity, self expression, independence, coordination, balance, cognitive thinking, and motor skills. Many extracurricular activities also give sensory input. Some extracurricular activities even have special needs programs. The most popular extracurricular activities are the sports (football, baseball, basketball, tennis, swimming, cheerleading, karate, and dance) and the fine arts (art, choir, and music).

When choosing an extracurricular activity for my special needs children, I always think about these things:

·        low student to teacher ratios

·        understanding instructor who is willing to work with my child

·        calm environment

·        cost of activity

Once we choose and activity, we then prep for it. I prep my children by:

·        reading social stories

·        watching shows or clips about the activity

·        looking at pictures and talking about the activity

After my children are prepped for the activity, we show up early so that we have time to adjust to a new environment, people, and objects. In case of anxiety, I always bring a chewy item. During the activity, I encourage my child’s participation and am realistic with my expectations. After the activity, I always try to build my children’s self-esteem by telling them something they did well. Then, we go home to practice and prep for next week.

VAK (Visual, Auditory, and Kinesthetic) Therapy

Just last week, I wrote about using a multisensory approach to help my son with his learning. This weekend I found a therapeutic program that uses the same approach in therapy. It is called VAK (Visual, Auditory, and Kinesthetic) Therapy. It was created by Bonnie Terry, M. Ed., BCET who is a Dyslexia and ADHD Expert. Bonnie Terry states, “When learning is hard, it is typically due to one or more areas of perception just not working as well as they should, could, and can. So if you address the underlying root cause of learning problems, learning CAN and DOES become easier. The Awaken the Scholar Within Visual, Auditory, and Kinesthetic Therapy Program does just that!” The basis of the program is that people use their senses (visual, auditory, tactile) to learn. When those systems are working well, learning is easier. The program strengthens those systems in twelve weeks.

This therapeutic program has audio and video lessons that come to you every week for twelve weeks. These lessons include activities and exercises that improve visual processing, audio processing, and tactile/ kinesthetic processing.

VAK therapy has been known to help spelling, note taking, writing, reading, memory, and comprehension. It has been used on students who have ADHD/ ADD, Dyslexia, Autism, and Sensory Processing Disorder.

This program is for first graders to adults and costs $997.00. You can read more about this program at: http://www.bonnieterrylearning.com/awaken-the-scholar-within-reading-writing-program-12-week-program/

You can also listen to “How We Learn Visual, Auditory, and Tactile Kinesthetic Learning”: http://www.bonnieterry.com/blog/learn-visual-auditory-tactile-kinesthetic-learning/

What Does Each Therapist Do?

This weekend I have talked to two people who asked me, “What does each of your children’s therapists do?” Since my children see many therapists, I thought I would write about each one.

1.      Speech Language Pathologist (SLP) or Speech Therapist provides evaluations and works with many different delays and disorders. Some include dysphagia (swallowing for drinking/ eating), feeding, oral motor, auditory processing, fluency, stuttering, lisp, expressive language, receptive language, social language, and articulation. They do x- rays for swallow studies to recommend strategies for better feeding, and they assess and identify developmental delays and disorders.

 

2.      Occupational Therapist (OT) help people perform everyday tasks and improve the function of the nervous system. For children, some everyday tasks that are worked on by an OT include: playing, eating, dressing, socializing, writing, and toileting. They help children with body awareness, coordination, motor skills, visual perception, self regulation, and reaction to sensory stimulus. An OT asses and identifies developmental delays and disorders. The parent is also included in the assessment (by filling out a sensory profile).

 

3.      Physical Therapist (PT) helps people with strength, flexibility, balance, posture, coordination, mobility, and endurance. They aid a person in learning how to move better and relieve pain. A PT provides examinations and evaluations to asses and identify developmental delays, disorders, and health problems. They also create treatment or rehabilitation plans to monitor and assess progress.

 

4.      Behavioral Therapist (Psychiatrist, Psychologist, Psychotherapist, ABA therapist, CD therapist) helps people modify or change behavior. They work with people who have anxiety, mood disorders, and mental disorders. They modify or change behavior through role play, discussions, social stories, relaxation techniques, journal writing, and social skill groups. Depending upon the individual’s needs, medication might also be prescribed by a psychiatrist.

 

5.      Animal Assisted Therapist helps people improve mental, physical, social, and emotional well being with animals (such as: horse, dog, cat, dolphin).  An AAT works on motor skills, balance, focus/ attention, self control, problem solving, communication, and social skills. They use animals as teaching aids, and to encourage movement and social interactions.

Reading Your Child’s Evaluation

For the past two months my children have had several evaluations. It just happens to be that time of year when we have our yearly testing. When you get an evaluation back, it can be very difficult and discouraging when you see words like “developmentally delayed”, “abnormal gait”, “expressive language disorder”, “feeding problems”, “developmental coordination disorder”, and “lack of normal physical development”. It can even be more difficult when you do not fully understand the terms. When reading your child’s evaluation, here is my advice:

1.     Ask questions: If you do not understand the terminology, ask the therapist. Have the therapist break it down for you and give you examples. Talk to the therapist about the plan and goals for the future.

 

2.     Educate yourself:  Research the terms or diagnosis on the internet. I have found great ideas of things I can do at home through a simple search.

 

3.     Notice the strengths and weaknesses: Congratulate your child on their strengths and use their strengths to help them overcome their weaknesses.

 

4.     Pay attention to the goals: The goals are your child’s plan. Meeting these goals will help your child succeed and make progress. Talk to your therapist about the goals often to make sure the right goals are set in place.

 

5.     Be Encouraged: Observe growth from your child’s last evaluation. Every bit of improvement is a step in the right direction.

 

Always remember that in the end, the evaluation and diagnosis is not a sign of failure but an opportunity for growth. Your child now has a plan to help their development, and help you point them in the right direction.

* If you are having trouble coping with your child’s evaluation and / or diagnosis, please seek professional help such as a counselor or join a parent support group.

Using a Multisensory Teaching Approach to Help Your Child

Today when I went to pick up my son from school, his teacher talked to me about how he was struggling in two areas of his school work. I am so glad she brought this to my attention, so I can address those skills at home. Today, a friend of mine asked me what I was going to do to help my son. I explained to her that I was going to do a multisensory approach. She thought that was a great idea to share, so I thought I would blog about it.

A multisensory approach is when you stimulate learning through the senses.  To learn children need to see, hear, and do (touch and movement). This will help the child’s brain to recall the information. Here are ways to stimulate through your child’s senses:

Visually (Sight):

·        Text with pictures

·        Charts/ graphic organizers

·        Flash cards

·        Video

·        Create art

·        Use highlighter

Auditory (Hear):

·        Music / song/ chants

·        Books on tape

·        Reading aloud

·        Computerized text readers

·        Video

Tactile (Touch):

·        Shaving cream/ sand/ finder paint/ salt trays

·        Puzzles

·        Manipulative

·        Build a model

Kinesthetic (Movement):

·        Games

·        Hand motions (count with finger)

·        Big movement  (count as you jump, count as you hop)

·        Act it out

Students with learning difficulties usually excel with a multisensory approach. This will help build confidence and create a successful learner.