Surviving the "Too Scary" in an Over-stimulating World

“Too scary” is a common phrase used in our house. Our children are easy over-stimulated by our over-stimulating world. Some things that are too scary include:

·        Loud noises (unless we are the ones making it J)

Loud toilets- too scary

Loud hand dryers- too scary

Loud music- too scary

Loud talking- too scary

Loud animals- too scary

·        Crowded places- too scary

·        Lots of movement- too scary

·        New places- too scary

·        New people too scary

 

To help our children learn how to adapt, we have put them in structured environments where they are able to work through their fear. For example, we signed our kids up for soccer this year. This to them is very scary. You have several people there including parents and kids. You have people cheering, and a lot of movement. When we first started, our son spent most of his time on the sidelines. He required a long warm-up time where he watched the other kids before he was able to get out there. After a year of soccer, he is doing better.

Yesterday, my sister was able to watch him practice for the first time. My son was so excited to show his Auntie his soccer skills. He ran to the edge of the field and started kicking the ball. She asked, “Why is he kicking over there instead of the field?”  I explained to her his need to warm-up and that he would get to the field once he felt comfortable. Since she hasn’t been to his games before, she didn’t realize how great it was that he was out there. Once he warmed up, he did join his team and even scored three goals!!!

During this journey, I have learned that we might have to do things a little differently than others, but eventually; we will get to where we need to be. When things seem “too scary”, we don’t avoid them, but learn how to work through them, even when it is hard. There are times when working through it looks like the story above where my child needs warm-up time. There are other times when it means that my child needs therapy tools such as chewies, headphones, or weighted blanket. I think it is so important to teach our children not to be avoiders, but learn how to cope, so one day they will be confident individuals.