Great Therapists

In the past three and a half years of therapy, we have had eighteen therapists work with my children. Out of those eighteen, I think very highly of seven. Today I was thinking about what sets those seven above the others. Here is what I came up with:

1.     The therapist conducts an evaluation of your child with more than one standardized test

2.     The therapist helps you understand the evaluation and discusses an action plan with goals

3.     The therapist monitors your child’s goals and gives you progress reports

4.     The therapist trains you and tells you what you can do at home

5.     The therapist listens to you, answers your questions, and helps you problem solve

6.     The therapist is available and reliable to provide treatment

7.     The therapist uses play in therapy

8.     The therapist is liked by your child
 

9.   The therapist is experienced and knowledgeable in their field
 

10.  The therapist’s personality is understanding and nurturing

Several times a week, I drive an hour round trip to our therapy clinic because I believe it has the best therapists in our area. Once you find a great therapist, no drive is too far for your child.

Having an “It’s Possible” Attitude

In the beginning of our journey, I was overwhelmed with emotions. I didn’t know how we were going to get through it. I didn’t understand why this was happening to my child. For a year, my child was developing and progressing ahead of the norm, why did the regression occur? I could have got myself in a rut of why’s, play the blame game, or make excuses. It is easy to say:

·        The therapist will address this

·        My child will grow out of it

·        I don’t know how to help my child

·        Why can’t my child _______________

·        Will my child ever be able to ____________

·        It’s too early to work on _______________

·        I don’t have time to do ____________

It is harder to step up and take action. After coming to terms with where we were at, I decided to approach it head on with an “It’s Possible” attitude.  I started thinking, “It is possible for my child to ______________ , if I tap into my resources and form a plan."

I first reached out to all of my resources. I talked to the developmental pediatrician, therapist, and family doctor to come up with realistic goals (both short and long term). I knew that the best approach to helping my child was to work as a team with the professionals.

Next, my husband and I then sat down and came up with a plan of what we were going to do at home to help our child reach the goals. We also went to training to get help from the professionals on how we could help our child.

Last, we monitored the goals and changed our plan when needed so that our child would feel successful. Some days we did have to take some steps back so our child wasn’t working on a frustration level. I believe that on those days re-evaluation is essential for constant progress.

Throughout the years I have kept our goals and progress notes. Every once in a while (especially on a hard day), I will look back at them and see how far we have come. It helps me remember that our goals are possible when we work as a team with the professionals, set up a plan, and monitor/ re- evaluate/ change our plan when needed.

A Classroom Teacher Is Not a Therapist

This week was parent/ teacher conferences. I am always nervous at this time of year because I don’t know what to really expect. To ease my nerves, I prepared. I wrote a list of questions and concerns on pad of paper. My main concern is our school choice for next year (Do we go public or private?). How he is doing this year will determine the course for next year.

The conference started off well. She told us that he struggled with days of the week, had some emerging skills with puzzles and shapes, but he mastered his colors, letters/ sounds, can count to 40, and add basic numbers (YAY!). Her biggest concern however, was his speech.

She said that she was worried about him having a chewy.  It prevented him from interacting with others. She said that when he doesn’t have it, kids are more likely to seek him to play, and he does better at circle time. She wanted to see if we could do away with his chewy to see if it helped with interaction now that he is transitioning better.

She also said that she doesn’t understand him sometimes, and we might consider speech therapy (she was aware we did therapy, but not certain on which ones). When I told her we have been in speech, OT, and PT, she told us that she is not a therapist, but the only therapy that she thinks he needs is speech. She would like to see him spend more time interacting with other children and playing then in a lot of therapies.

This made me furious. She is right, she is not a therapist. Why is she trying to tell me what my child needs in therapy and how much? The OT is going to help him find other coping strategies since she doesn’t want him to have a chewy. The PT is going to help him have the core strength to sit in a chair to do his school work. I wouldn’t be spending the time taking my child to therapy if I didn’t believe he needed it. Believe me; I would rather be at a park or hanging out with the neighbors outside. I did not choose this. I am just trying to do everything I can to prepare my child to be the best he can be.

This conference has now caused questions in our course of therapy. The course that has helped us gain so much progress. I hope that all of these questions are resolved soon with the facts of the evaluations that prove a NEED despite what the teacher says. I am not saying that people should totally disregard what classroom teachers say. I think that it is important to listen to classroom teachers suggestions, but I think that it is more important to listen to the professionals in their field and look at the big picture of all the information on the child to make a decision.

What to Discuss at Parent/ Teacher Conferences

Talking to your child’s teacher is very important for their academic development.  Research shows that parental involvement increases school readiness, achievement and social skills. One opportunity set aside to talk to your child’s teacher is parent / teacher conferences.

Before Parent / Teacher conferences, it is always important to prepare a list of questions and concerns that you have regarding your child’s education. I always bring my list with me, so I do not leave wishing I would have discussed a missed topic. I also talk to my child about their thoughts and concerns about school, so I know areas I need to address.

Here are some of my questions:

·         What are my child’s strengths and weaknesses?

·         How is my child doing academically?

·         Is my child on grade level?

·         How does my child compare to the others in the class?

·         Can I see examples of class work?

·         How do you grade?

·         What accommodations are you making for my child?

·         How is my child emotionally in your classroom?

·         How is my child doing socially?

·         What can we do at home to help my child progress?

If you have any concerns, be open and honest with the teacher and see if you can form a plan together to solve the problem. The plan might be a few strategies that will help your child in the classroom. After creating a plan, make sure to schedule a follow up conference to see if the plan/ strategies are working.

When the conference is done, go over the conference with your child stressing their strengths. Also, talk to them about any concerns that were mentioned and the plan. Create a reward system at home to help follow up with the plan and note your child’s progress. Then, let your child know that you will be checking in with the teacher.

Make sure that you follow through with the teacher.  A strong parent/ teacher relationship takes a lot of effort but will pay off in the end.

Foamnasium

Whenever I find an incredible company or product, I am always quick to tell other parents who are in my same shoes. Last night as I was looking for a Christmas gift for my children, and I came upon Foamnasium. The gift I was looking for had to:

·        help promote motor development

·        increase core strength

·        encourage problem solving

·        give my child sensory input

 

Foamnasium’s products do all of these things. All of their products are created with foam and vinyl. They are very sturdy and durable for climbing, crashing, and sitting. You can buy several blocks individually or buy blocks as a set, so your child can make an obstacle course. I have found their products cheapest on Amazon. The products they have include:

Large blocks:

·        Cubes

·        Wedges

·        Mailbox

·        Steps

·        Circles

·        Triangles

·        Squares

·        Tunnels

Furniture:

·        Cloud Chair

·        Floor Pillow

·        Chair

·        Center Table

·        Corner Table

·        Ottoman

·        Pull Out Sofa

·        Bench

Other:

Foam Man

Play Mats

Foam Home

Sturiblock Set

Playground Set

All of the reviews I have read for this product have been really good. I am excited to get our order in! I know my children will love it!

The Heartache of Comparison

I do not know why I do it. It might be the teacher in me trying to constantly assess my child, but I am constantly comparing my child to others. I didn’t always do this. I remember when my son was young, and I didn’t worry about other children. I just focused on him. Then, he got sick, and things quickly changed. Doctors and therapists would ask me questions about my child’s abilities. I remember discussing those questions with family members who told me to start noticing what other kids were doing. After that, I think I got obsessed with comparing.

Last week, I even found myself staring at this stupid sticker chart in my son’s class looking at how all the other kids had several stickers and my child had one. I even went so far as to ask a mother (whose child had the most stickers) what she was doing at home to help her child excel academically. Her response, “Nothing.”  I wanted to go sit in my car and cry because we go to therapy and spend time every day working on skills. Why does it have to be so hard for my child and so easy for others? Why do I get so stressed out about performance?

It isn’t healthy for me or my child. My child is happy and healthy. He could care less about the sticker chart. Every day he gives his best with a sweet smile. I should focus more on his unique talents, interests, and strengths, then what others are doing.

 I also need to form realistic expectations and goals. When my child accomplishes the goal or meets an expectation at his own pace, I need to celebrate him.

Yesterday, his teacher told me he earned another sticker on his sticker chart. For once, I didn’t stop to look how many stickers the others kids got that day. I picked up my child and gave him a big hug and told him we were going out for ice cream. It was a good day.

Help with Clothing

Getting dressed is a struggle for us every day. My son longs to be independent, but his motor skills make getting dressed difficult. We also have trouble with clothes feeling scratchy or too tight or too loose. Recently, I have found some amazing products to help us with dressing:

1.      Going seamless- several companies make seamless underwear and socks to make undergarments more comfortable and “not scratchy” (as my son would say). We get our seamless underwear from fun and function and our seamless socks from Smart Knit Kids.

 

2.      Elastic waistband- since my son struggles with zippers and buttons, elastic waistbands help him feel independent. Fun and function makes great elastic waistband cargo pants for boys and stylish leggings for girls. We have also found elastic waistband pants at Gymboree, Crazy 8’s, and Children’s Place.

 

3.      Hugging T- Shirts- to help give my son deep pressure throughout the day, he wears a hugging undershirt. You can buy Under Armor brand or Fun and Function also sells this product. Fun and Function sells really cute graphic ones as well.

 

4.      EZ Socks- these socks have loops at the top to help with pulling socks onto feet.  They are available at Fun and Function.

 

5.      Weighted items- weighted hoodies, vests, and caps are also helpful in providing deep pressure too. Fun and Function sells these items and you cannot tell that they are weighted and different from other kids’ clothing.

 

If you are also interested in finding solutions for clothing, I highly recommend the “Clothing” section of Fun and Functions website. They have many items that I did not mention that might help you. The items listed above are the main ones we use, as well as their chewlry.